Let’s start with the basics.
Gay couple
UK-based
James, Male, 38, no fertility issues
Partner, male, 31, no fertility issues
Surrogate and egg donor, female, no fertility issues
Current status: pregnant (succeeded with first Béa Treatment Kit)
TTC: 4 years
First of all, where are you today?
Our little girl is due April 2024 and we’re so excited.
Why are you sharing your story?
I imagine there are a lot of people around who are in a similar situation to us. We’re a gay couple starting our family with a surrogate, and we’re not making a baby ‘normally’, really, but it all worked out well and I thought it might be helpful to others to share my experience.
Tell us about yourself and your family
My partner and I have been together 14 years and we’ve been thinking about having our own children for a long time now.
We explored adoption, and we explored the surrogacy route in great depth. There’s a really long waiting list for IVF with surrogacy in the UK, and we were wondering what to do when a dear friend offered to be our surrogate. We couldn’t believe it!
How did you find Béa?
Well, we’d done a lot of research and knew a lot about what our options were. What we liked about the Béa Treatment was the cervical cap – it looked like it was really well thought through, it looked easy to use, and it looked like a product that had been well designed. It’s not just another turkey baster (cue Béa Team blush).
What made you decide to try the Béa Treatment?
We personally don’t have £11k to spend on IVF. We thought that three cycles with the Béa Treatment would be a good starting point, and if it didn’t work, we would at least know we’d tried, and could then think about our next steps.
We waited for the Béa launch, we got up early and made sure we were first on the list the day Béa launched. We couldn’t wait to get started, really.
What was your first step when you decided to go ahead with your surrogate?
We’ve done all of our semen investigations and STI tests. We used an ExSeed at-home sperm test (Team Béa here: ExSeed are great, DM us for a discount code). All the results were clear, and as soon as we all knew we had good sperm and no STIs it just became a matter of waiting for Béa to launch, and waiting for our surrogate to ovulate.
There were some logistics conversations around whose house we use the treatment at, and how it’s all going to work, but we worked all of that out with no problems.
Our surrogate has had kids before, so she’s really understanding and supportive. She also knows what she’s doing, which is helpful. She’s using her own eggs, so as well as being our surrogate, she’s also our egg donor.
Where are you today?
Our girl is due April 2024, and we are so excited for the future. We hope that sharing our experience has been helpful to anyone trying to start their family.
*Note from Tess: I listened to the interview transcript to write this story, and remembered that this user interview was conducted back in June 2023, before we’d shipped out any Béa Treatment Kits. James’s interview gave me goosebumps as I listened to it today (February 2024), because at one point in the conversation, he says, “I’m hoping this will all work. I hope we’ll be having another conversation 10 months down the line and it’ll all have worked.” It’s worked, James, it’s worked, and I couldn’t be more delighted for you. Thank you for being the first.
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Ava’s Story